I haven't been able to update you recently - I've been so busy!! Paige is feeling better, but unfortunetly I am not! When she was very sick, I held her and rocked her wishing I could take over all the sickness - and my wish came true!!

So today we went for breakfast, then I took Paige shopping so Darren could sleep to get ready for tonight's night shift. I really didn't spend too much, which is a miracle for me. Then I met Sarah and her kids for supper at the Olive Garden. I was very happy to discover that I could eat quite a large variety of items and still stay within my points allowance for Weight Watchers.

Speaking of WW - my first week I lost 6.2 lbs!!! I am so proud of myself. They say that I should not loose that much every week, just in the beginning as your body is adjusting to eating more healthfully. I am really enjoying it so far. I am thinking that this one is going to be a good one for me. So now I am 227.6 lbs. I will have different goals throughout my weight loss, my first one is a 10% goal. Here is a ticker for a visual!

She was up almost all night.....and continues to be soooooo demanding. I just want to scream I am so exhausted. Physically spent, and emotionally drained. Darren needs to get home soon or I am going to loose it. Tonight I am going out scrapbooking. I might not get much done, but at least I'll have an evening away from my little sickie.

It's been a very trying week...but most of it is not my business to share. I will however fill you in on my little girls struggles!!!

Wednesday night I fell asleep shortly after midnight....then Paige woke up around 12:45. She was so upset, and burning up a fever! I gave her Tylenol, but she was obviouly in pain. Her fever went down a little, and she fell back asleep somewhere around 4am. Thursday morning she only slept until 8am. So I got about 4 hours of sleep last night. The fever just got worse through out the day...and she became more and more lethargic. With fevers topping at 39.8, and getting little comfort from Tylenol...I took her to the Dr.'s and she has Croup! My poor kid. She is on more Tylenol for the fever - I was not giving her enough. And an oral steroid for the cough. My doctor was pretty worried about her - has me doing hourly temp. checks...tonight so far is ending up like the last few. I am getting little sleep. (Notice the time now??!!!) So this is what being a mother is ALL about!!!

I'm sure she'll be fine, and I am doing my best at catering to her, helping her through this. What a terrible feeling to watch my child in pain, and know there is very little I can do about it. I am sure this is the first of many, many, boo-boos, sicknesses and ouchies to come.

I had such a fun time scrapbooking the Saturday. You are right, I should scan them and make an "online" album! Maybe I'll do that soon....

Today was a great day - had mom and baby yoga this morning, then went to Millenium Place for Mom's group. It was nice to meet some people I have never met before, but chatted with on the net. Tonight Darren goes bowling...I have no plans. Maybe Paige and I will watch TV and clean up. Our house isn't that bad...but it could use some straightening.

So...I've had almost 4 full days on WW. I am doing pretty good. It has been challenging to stay within my points allowance for the day, but I am doing okay. I am having a hard time eating all the "proper" foods - just want to blow my points on bad food! I am learning how to eat properly. We'll see this Thursday at my weigh in how I did.

Congrats to Denise!!! I am so happy for you. Congratulations on getting pregnant. You'll soon join the ranks of us sleepless mothers...but it's worth every moment.

Our house is coming along so well! I am so happy. I can't wait to move it. It actually looks like a "house" now. They completed the framing friday - so next is the mechanical rough in..then pooring the basement cement. Here is what is looks like today. We walked all throughout the house. It's very cool.


Tonight I am escaping to go scrapbooking with Laura. I am exicited for many reasons...

1. I'll be with grownups! No kids! (Daddy's watching Paige, so if you are free tonight, maybe you can call and see how he's doing. LOL

2. I get to spend time with one of my new friends Laura. I haven't had a chance yet to visit with her - without the complete distraction of one of our children demolishing or causing havoc. It will be nice.

3. I get to scrapbook!!! Need I say more??? (PLUS..my sweet husband gave me lots of money to buy anything I want!! He is so amazing.)

Paige had her first day in her dayhome yesterday. We went for around 1oam, and I left the house at 11am. Paige stayed there until about 3pm. She did so well - I DID so well! I am so happy with this dayhome. I am so lucky to have found a winner. She is young, energetic, clean, organized, affectionate, involved...I am sooooo grateful! She is the most expensive one we looked at, but she is the best. I would pay anything for a home that I know my angel will be safe and happy in. Paige will be going every Thursday until I go back to work. It's a good time for Paige to get used to the home, and lets be honest - it's also to give me piece of mind knowing that she is "okay" without me.

Last night I joined Weight Watchers. I really had been thinking about it for months.... I did so well on it last time, I regret quitting. So, I joined Barb and Carla. (Let me know if it's okay to use your names here, if not I'll remove them :-) I am going to throw it out there - no hiding anything. AND you poor suckers who read this blog...will get to hear my deepest emotions, and brutal honesty. I weigh 233.8 lbs!!! I am kinda happy about that - since I was 241 before getting pregnant - and 249 at my highest during my pregnancy. I figure that 233 is pretty good. I wish I joined right after having Paige, because I was down to 224 a few months ago. Well, in a few months I'll be there again. It took me ten years to gain this much weight - so it's not going to fall off in one week! Also - I need to go slowly or my flabby skin won't shrink at the same rate, then I'll need surgery.

Thank you to my blog family, you are so supportive! Wish me luck on this lifestyle chage I am making.

Today my good friend Sharla from my Respiratory Therapy program is coming over with her 11 month old Kira. I am so excited to see them. They came to visit us when Paige was born, but she lives so far away (Saskatoon)....so I can't wait to see her.

(Keltie - the movie yesterday was "Last Vacation" with Queen Latifah. It was pretty cute. I enjoyed it!)

Fun Day!

Today Paige and I are going to see a movie, then going to Leduc to do some asthma education for a lady's little boy...then coming back to Sherwood Park so Auntie Heather can babysit Paige so I can go scrapbooking in Edmonton!! Lots of driving around, but it is worth it.

TMI - I am still bleeding, I think this is nature's payback for not having a period since July 2004....

Aunt Flo!!

Well, Aunt Flo reared her ugly head tonight around 6pm. It all starts to make sense....my insane grumpiness, my craving for chocolate and chips...my sore muscles. Yup, I totally never realized - once I slowed down with nursing Paige, my hormones would return to "normal". So there you have it. I am bleeding again. Thank you Aunt Flo! Can't say I've missed you all these months. But...uh hum...welcome back?!!

Sinus Cold Lives Here.

Of course...I'm sick. Why can't I be healthy forever? I haven't been sick in a long time, or at least I don't rember when I was sick last. I am so stuffed up. I feel all sinusy, and my head is pounding. Paige ended up in bed with me at 3am last night, I just didn't have the energy to keep waking up with her. She woke up this morning at 8am, so I got a good 5 hrs sleep last night. I was so happy when she went down at 10:30 for a nap, but she was up before 11:30. So at least I got a 45 min nap myself this morning.

I am so pissed off! I got Paige to sleep at 2:30pm (in bed with me) I feel so crummy, so I fell asleep - I turned off all the ringers in the house so nothing would disturb our sleep, then Darren's cell phone rang at 2:55pm!!! Woke Paige up, and she wouldn't go back to sleep. Urgh, I only got a 15 min nap. I am so grumpy. I didn't even go out to do all the things I wanted to do today, just thought it better to stay home. Imissed Yoga, and playgroup. Tomorrow Auntie H. is babysitting so I can go scrapbooking with T.H. I need to get away to restore what little is left of my sanity. I am soooo looking forward to it!!

It REALLY sucks having Darren working 10pm-10am for the next 4 weeks. It's like I am a single parent.

Thanks for joining in on my pity-party. Please continue about your previously happy day!

Sleep Relief...

Last night was a blessing because Paige fell asleep in the car on my way home last night. Sarah invited us over for a banana split party (yummy! Thanks!!) and I was there until 11:30pm. I put Paige in jammies and a fresh diaper before leaving...she was dead asleep by the time I got home. I just had to pick her up and put her in her crib. That was a blessing. She did not stay asleep for long - was up so many times in the night. By 3am she was sleeping with us in our bed. Are we just perpetuating the problem by allowing her to sleep in our bed for a portion of the night? Don't answer that one...I know the answer is yes. BUT it is so hard to resist when she sleeps soooo well in our bed, that the sleep I can get is so tempting compared to the "get up and put her soother in her mouth, and hold her hand for 15 mins - every half hour" routine. I have put some more books on hold at the library. I think I'll have to do some more research on the subject before attempting anymore. The Furber method was just too cruel. So for now, it's lay her down awake, and hold her hand until she falls asleep. I know...it's not the same as letting her fall asleep on her own. But I look at it this way, it's a hell of a lot better than it was when I had to rock her to sleep, then slowly and CARFULLY put her in her crib.

Okay, non-mommy stuff:

Our house is in the framing stages! It is so cool. We went to check on it today, and they wern't working on it, so we could walk around inside and everything!! Here is the view from across the street.

This photo is of our front entrance way, looking from the family room:

I am so excited! It's getting closer and closer to being like a real house. Today I spent 3 hrs cleaning/packing/organizing in our bedroom. It was very hard work. On a positive note, County Clothes Line got a "generous" donation of 8 huge bags of clothing and assorted items.

Why does teaching your baby how to "self-soothe" have to be so trying, and damn hard. I am so sick of the sleepness nights. She just won't get the picture. I am almost at the end of my rope. I think I have to try going by the book - exactly. I don't know what else to do. She is in her room screaming as we speak...

I guess I am just frustrated. Thanks for being my outlet.

Not much on the plan for today. We are interviewing for a dayhome today. I am hoping to get Paige started one day a week until I go back to work. It will be nice for her to slowly adjust to the home, and the people. She loves playing with other kids, so I am hoping she loves it. The lady today feels very promising, so we'll see how it goes. Other than that - we have nothing to do!!! I think I'll go to the library at some point, and also take something out for supper. Yup, nothing exciting here today.

I know I've said this before, but my girl is growing so fast! She now bobs her head side to side to music (or to copy someone), or bounces up and down to a beat. She loves "The Doodlebops". She is turning into a little girl now instead of a baby! She eats solid foods all day and will only nurse or take a bottle once in the morning after breakfast, then once before bed.

So anyway..today is movie Tuesday. I am meeting Jenn today to see "Fun with Dick and Jane". My Stars and Strollers days are numbered. I think I only have something like 10 weeks left of maternity leave. I have mixed emotions about returning to work. I can't wait to get back to a job I love, but I am scared to leave my baby girl all day. I feel like I am going to miss her growing up. I have to also do some dayhome and daycare calling today. I need to start Paige in a dayhome once a week. It will give me time to learn to separte from her - and also see if the dayhome works for us. I also need to work at getting this house ready to sell. So I need time to go room to room purging non-essentials. I can't wait to move! Unfortunelty it will be happening around the same time as me going back to work. I hope that it is not too much change on PJ. I'm sure she'll be fine.

Yesterday's Baby and Mom Yoga was awesome. I recommend it. I wish we had started sooner! It was very relaxing, and Paige seemed to enjoy the interaction with other babies. She is such a ham. She definelty knows when to "put on a show".

WEDNESDAY???!!! Wednesday was the last time I posted??? Well, I better be careful or I will fall off the wagon. I feel like I have so much to say today.

I'll start with a summary of my "missed days". Thursday - AM visit with friend Barb. She is quitting selling PartyLite, so I had to get my fill of dicounted items before she is gone. It was nice - she even made me lunch! In the afternoon Darren and I got to go visit L. & P. and see the gorgeous baby girl twins again. Gosh they are so cute - and small! It is amazing how long ago it seems that we were caring for a newborn. It all came rushing back - the little clothes, the newborn "cry", not being able to support their own heads, small hands....makes me want an other. Well, I already wanted an other, but I want an other MORE now! I have to go back to work...I wish I could do both. Wait - I will be in a few months!! Thursday night I met Keltie at the Mongolie Grill. It was soooo yummy. Man that place kicks ass! Then we went shopping at IKEA. I was so tired by the time I got home around 9:30pm. But Paige was refreshed from a nap in the car, and stayed up until 2am!! I was so tired on Friday.

Friday I got up and went to T's Dayhome. It was fun for Paige to play with the other infants and toddlers. I am feeling less anxious about leaving her to work. I stayed there until 6pm, then I left for my friend Sarah's Princess House party.

Saturday we went for breakfast, then I did some grocery shopping, came home and cleaned up the house. The Hazen's came over after supper and we all got really drunk. It was so much fun. I haven't really laughed as hard as I did last night in FOREVER. I really love those guys. They are so amazing. Paige blessed me by waking up at 5am today..urgh. At least she went back to sleep until 7:30. Darren and I made a deal that he gets to nap with her morning nap, and I get to nap with her the evening nap. While the other cleans up some of the aftermath from the previous evening's festivities.

So that leaves us with the remainder of today....recovery!!! Going nowhere, doing nothing. I think I'll scrapbook a little. There you have it. The Reader's Digest version of the last three days!

I've been doing my absolute best to stay busy - It's just how I like it!!

Tuesday I was fortunate to go shopping. Bought a really nice bra from La Senza, and a pair of Van's from Sport Check. I've always wanted a pair - so when I saw them on sale, and that they were pink - I couldn't resist! I also cleaned the library out of Baby Einstein videos.

Today my friend Jenn came over and we scrapbooked all day - My favorite!!

Boring day. I have been playing on the net for like 3 hrs....I am totally addicted. Paige is sleeping, and Darren is too....(he's working night shift tonight). I am totally bored. Anyone have any idea of things I can do this week. Staying home all day is just not my idea of fun. It would be if I was alone. I'd sleep - oh, sleep - my long lost friend. (Ha Ha Carrie, just you wait!!!)

Anyone want to get together for something, anything!!!!

I'm back to blogging...

We were out at a party until 3am last night - and Paige the party animal didn't got to sleep until 1:30am. It was so cute...she just fell asleep on the couch. While all the partiers carried on still around her. She is such a ham. She didn't dare want to fall asleep and miss something exciting. The funny thing is, we actually missed the "ringing in" of the new year because no one knew how to change the channel on the television...and then when we actually switched the channel, the countdown credits were playing. It was very anti-climatic, and quite dissapointing. I wondered if that was how my year was going to follow suit. Lets hope not!

Today I have not been feeling great. I got a massive headache last night at the party, and I feel so run down. Darren (the AMAZING man that he is) woke up with Paige this morning at 9:oo, and let me sleep! He woke me up at 10:30 for bacon and eggs, then let me go back to bed! I took Paige with me for her morning nap and we slept until 1pm. Darren came and took the baby, and let me keep on sleeping. I just got up at 2pm. I wonder if I am fighting something new...or if this is a continuation of my colon thing... I completely feel better with ginger ale and advil, so I am keeping those two things at my side for the remainder of the day.

We are leaving in about an hour to go to Darren's mother's house. It is for her annual "New Years Day Supper". She cooks up a MASSIVE feast, complete with all kinds of yummy delights. In the past it has been exactly the thing to ale my hang overs. I am getting ready to stuff my face. I am sure my stomach will ache tonight and tomorrow.

So with the stomach illness, and Christmas, and Darren being home a lot over the holidays, I haven't been around the computer to post. But I'd have to say, I have been thinking about it - just never got around to doing it.

My stomach started feeling better around Wednesday, so I went off my medication. I then started pumping, because I didn't "dry up" yet - and got all my milk back. So Paige was very happy that on Thursday night she could nurse again. I am still supplementing with formula. I will only nurse once or twice a day now.

Anyway, this blog is getting long - so I'll leave for now. Here is my little angel at the Galaxy Kids area on Thursday:

She had so much fun in the balls. I will post more pictures later this week, some of Christmas too!